You skipped the part where they absolutely do not value human life or care about the suffering of others. That explains the most why this is the easiest option for them to continue wielding their power without having to compromise on any ethical or moral value in their life.

You can’t accurately (nor truthfully) look at from their point of view without adopting that specific part of their view.

That’s where I learned about the candy canes and clowns that come with the high fructose syrup.

This doesn’t make any sense. The dad’s response can’t come first because it’s supposed to be a response to her saying “I’m dying” and him comedically misinterpreting it.

But her response can’t come first because she already identifies him as dad which makes his introduction as dad not make sense, and also because she asks him to stop as if he already made his joke.

It’s as if the text is dropping us in after the setup just so we can laugh at the punchline but then they also have her respond to the punchline with a reference to the setup in case we didn’t get it. But anyone who doesn’t get the joke (because it’s a reference to a joke, not a joke) isn’t going to get the joke from this little dialogue because it doesn’t even make sense as a dialogue.